Aller Anfang ist schwer

Alhamdulillah, I generally start to pick up writing again. Sebenarnya dah lama sangat tak menulis. Bukan sebab tak ada idea, bukan sebab busy. Tapi mungkin sebab malas. Malas nak buat assessment untuk hari ini. Tapi bila difikirkan barulah perasan sebenarnya hari-hari ini cepat sangat berlalu. It moves so fast that I don't even realise what had really happen today. Everything was just like a passing wind: unnoticed.

It's really sad that my days are being forgotten just like that. Dulu memanglah rajin mengupdatekan blog dan post topik-topik dan buah fikiran kat facebook. Aber jetzt mache ich das nicht mehr. Ich lasse alles mir vorbei passen, ohne zu überlegen was ich gemacht habe. Aber Alhamdulillah, dass ich jetzt nochmal beginne zu schreiben.

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Wie der Titel laut: es ist nicht einfach etwas zu anfangen. Egal ob es etwas einfach oder kompliziert ist. Aller Anfang ist schwer.

Aber, wissen Sie, dass Alle hängt nur von uns selbst ab. Kadang-kadang Allah dah bukakan hati kita untuk melakukan kebaikan, tetapi kita meletakkan perkara itu ke tepi kerana kita merasakan yang kita akan buat perkara tersebut nanti. Kita tunda perasaan itu. Dan DISITU LAH kesilapan kita.

Itulah godaan syaitan sebenarnya. Syaitan tak membisikkan perkara yang buruk directly kedalam fikiran kita. Mereka akan menyelinapkan pekara-perkara keburukan dalam sekecil-kecil perkara. Ok, mungkin itu tak berapa jelas atau mungkin akan menimbulkan tanda tanya.

Cuba bayangkan one simple situation: pinggan di dapur dah lama bertimbun dan tak terbasuh. Well, the main reason kita tak basuh pinggan-pinggan itu in the first place is because kita malas. Dan bayangkan satu hari kita dapat satu ilham untuk basuh pinggan-pinggan tu.

So in general kita ada dua option:
a) pergi basuh pinggan
b) tak basuh pinggan

Tapi kita nak basuh pinggan sebab that is the right thing. But here is the thing. Syaitan works in a way that they provide a third option: lets do it later because u might have more time.

And we and our nafs succumb to that third option. BAD IDEA

Lama kelamaan kita tak akan basuh pinggan-pinggan tu. Sebab kita tangguh dan tangguhkan perkara yang kita nak buat tu. Jetzt können wir das mit einer der wichtigsten Sachen in unser Leben verbinden: Solat. Well, now u got the idea what i want to talk about.

Bila kita dah lama tak menunaikan solat dan tiba-tiba kita merasakan yang something is missing in our life. Trust me, that missing thing is called solat. Zu sagen, dass wir das später machen konnen, ist nicht der Antwort. Jangan tinggalkan Solat, trust me...

So thats the thing: self control is very important.

Assalamualaikum :D

P.S. Salah satu sebab kenapa aku start balik menulis ialah: jeng jeng jeng: HTC One aku yang baru sampai, hehe :P

P.S.S. Sorry about the grammar. No matter if its Malay, English or Deutsch, I'll always make a mistake.

The Letter bond by strings of Fate seperated by Space and Time

NAIF Karena Kamu Cuma Satu 

Kau yang paling setia, kau yang teristimewa

Kau yang aku cinta, cuma engkau saja

Dari semua pria aku yang juara

Dari semua wanita kau yang paling sejiwa

Denganmu semua air mata menjadi tawa suara ria

Akankah kau selalu ada menemani dalam suka duka

Denganmu aku bahagia, denganmu semua ceria

Janganlah kau berpaling dariku karena kamu cuma satu untukku

Kau satu-satunya dan tak ada dua

Apalagi tiga, cuma engkau saja

Denganmu semua air mata menjadi tawa suara ria

Akankah kau selalu ada menemani dalam suka duka

Denganmu aku bahagia, denganmu semua ceria

Janganlah kau berpaling dariku karena kamu cuma satu untukku

Kau satu-satunya dan tak ada dua

Apalagi tiga, cuma engkau saja

Dari semua pria aku yang juara aku yang juara

Dari semua wanita kau yang paling sejiwa

Denganmu semua air mata menjadi tawa suara ria

Akankah kau selalu ada menemani dalam suka duka

Denganmu aku bahagia, denganmu semua ceria

Janganlah kau berpaling dariku karena kamu cuma satu untukku

Untukku, untukku, untukku, untukku

________________________________________________________________________________

Assalamualaikum. Dear Klein,
      To her, whom my heart lies. To her, whom I'll claim, once i've travelled my journey. To her, whom I tied my future to. To her, my wings.

To her, My Future Wife.

      It is really painful, this feeling that I have. I really want you to be here, to see you smile, to sit next to you, to talk to you about almost everything, to tease and being tease, and to cry and laugh with you as much we can together here. But however my dear, as much as I want that to happen, I don't want you to be hurt because this has not always been your dream: to come here to pursue your studies. It would be really selfish of me just to have you for myself here with me meanwhile you are deeply hurt inside, doing something that you don't really want to do. Thus because of that, I had convinced myself that this would only for the best. For me to work my best, here in this land of strangers, and to secure the future that i have planned.

      Remember when you followed me up until i can't see you anymore at the airport. I feel that I really want to grab you at that time and not to let you go. To bring you to my parents and tell them that I want you! But He have other plans. Plans that we can only imagine and anticipate. But I have faith, that whatever plans He have are for the best of both of us. The happy ending/beginning that we have waited for. So my love, I hope that you would have faith in Him too.

________________________________________________________________________________

Avenged Sevenfold Dear God

A lonely road, crossed another cold state line

Miles away from those I love

Purpose hard to find 

While I recall all the words you spoke to me 

Can't help but wish that I was there 

Back where I'd love to be, oh yeah 

Dear God the only thing I ask of you 

Is to hold her when I'm not around 

When I'm much too far away 

We all need that person who can be true to you 

But I left her when I found her 

And now I wish I'd stayed 

'Cause I'm lonely and I'm tired 

I'm missing you again, oh no 

Once again 

There's nothing here for me on this barren road

There's no one here while the city sleeps 

And all the shops are closed 

Can't help but think of the times I've had with you 

Pictures and some memories will have to help me through, oh yeah 

Dear God the only thing I ask of you is

To hold her when I'm not around, 

When I'm much too far away 

We all need that person who can be true to you 

I left her when I found her 

And now I wish I'd stayed 

'Cause I'm lonely and I'm tired 

I'm missing you again oh no 

Once again 

Some search, never finding a way

Before long, they waste away 

I found you, something told me to stay 

I gave in, to selfish ways 

And how I miss someone to hold 

When hope begins to fade... 

A lonely road, crossed another cold state line

Miles away from those I love 

Hope is hard to find 

Dear God the only thing I ask of you is

To hold her when I'm not around, 

When I'm much too far away 

We all need the person who can be true to you 

I left her when I found her 

And now I wish I'd stayed 

'Cause I'm lonely and I'm tired 

I'm missing you again oh no 

Once again...

________________________________________________________________________________

      Mia, there is no other better woman out there for me other than you. 3rd of September last year had really made me realize, that you are the only one. The one that holds my heart in your hand really dearly, and I've been holding your's in mine. I wont break you heart! Because it is mine too... I want to keep it, treasure it, keep it in a safe place where only I can have...

      Klein, I will prevent with all my heart from causing you to break. I'll hug you tight, keep you safe... I'm going to make you mine, I'll be you Imam. And I will claim you, when the time has come.

Your Love,

Raphael.